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joke for the day
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purplemoon99(at)bellsouth
Guest

Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 6:29 pm Post subject: joke for the day

Rick, It sounds like I'am as gulity as every one else about over reacting 

about this"hawg" thing,so lets get back to building and helping each other. 

That hawg. that larry built is a 10+ and my Hog-Air now has a 130 Ram eng. 

in it.I will admit that hog's are a hard way to go,that's why we are 

experimental's Have a good night and fly safe.  Joe N101HD 601XL   The H D 

now stands for Hotel Delta

---

purplemoon99(at)bellsouth
Guest

Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 6:46 pm Post subject: joke for the day

I'am not the same guy , but I've the plane,and I changed the eng.I too have 

a harley and a victory Victory ?That's a thought !

---

Joemotis(at)aol.com
Guest

Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 7:42 pm Post subject: joke for the day

You know, with so much serious horsepower superbike motors out there, how  come they are not turning up in Light sport aircraft?

  

 Joe Motis

  do not archive



See what's free at AOL.com. 

  [quote][b]

purplemoon99(at)bellsouth
Guest

Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 7:55 pm Post subject: joke for the day

I think it's because the trans. and eng. are in one case. I saw aYahama  powered plane once.the trans was locked in 3rd. gear..

 [quote]   ---

purplemoon99(at)bellsouth
Guest

Posted: Thu Jun 07, 2007 7:58 pm Post subject: joke for the day

BMW makes a aircraft eng,It's out of there 4 cy. bike

 [quote]   ---

cbaron66

Joined: 17 May 2007
Posts: 16

Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 5:59 am Post subject: Re: joke for the day

I don't want to sound like a nattering nabob of negativity but I'm afraid I also belive like Larry does- this is no place for humor. Shouldn't this be a place to learn about Zenith aircraft? If I want humor, I look in the mirror.

rickpitcher

Joined: 27 Feb 2007
Posts: 76

Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 8:19 am Post subject: Re: joke for the day (one more time)

Australian Flight Review,  Do Not Archive



Hi Mate,



I am writing to you because I need your help to get me bloody

pilot's

license back. You keep telling me you got all the right contacts.

Well now's your chance to make something happen for me because,

mate,

I'm bloody desperate.



But first, I'd better tell you what happened during my last flight

review with the CAA Examiner



On the phone, Ron (that's the CAA dickhead) seemed a reasonable sort

of a bloke. He politely reminded me of the need to do a flight

review

every two years. He even offered to drive out, have a look over my

property and let me operate from my own strip. Naturally I agreed to

that.



Anyway, Ron turned up last Wednesday. First up, he said he was a bit

surprised to see the plane on a small strip outside my homestead,

because the ALA (Authorised Landing Area) is about a mile away. I

explained that because this strip was so close to the homestead, it

was more convenient than the ALA, and despite the power lines

crossing about midway down the strip, it's really not a problem to

land and take-off, because at the halfway point down the strip

you're

usually still on the ground.



For some reason Ron seemed nervous. So, although I had done the pre-

flight inspection only four days earlier, I decided to do it all

over

again. Because the prick was watching me carefully, I walked around

the plane three times instead of my usual two.



My effort was rewarded because the colour finally returned to Ron's

cheeks. In fact, they went a bright red. In view of Ron's obviously

better mood, I told him I was going to combine the test flight with

some farm work, as I had to deliver three poddy calves from the home

paddock to the main herd. After a bit of a chase I finally caught

the

calves and threw them into the back of the ol' Cessna 172. We

climbed

aboard, but Ron started getting onto me about weight and balance

calculations and all that crap. Of course I knew that sort of thing

was a waste of time because, calves like to move around a bit

particularly when they see themselves 500 feet off the ground! So,

it's bloody pointless trying to secure them as you know. However, I

did tell Ron that he shouldn't worry as I always keep the trim wheel

set on neutral to ensure we remain pretty stable at all stages

throughout the flight.



Anyway, I started the engine and cleverly minimized the warm-up time

by tramping hard on the brakes and gunning her to 2,500 rpm. I then

discovered that Ron has very acute hearing, even though he was

wearing a bloody headset. Through all that noise he detected a

metallic rattle and demanded I account for it. Actually it began

about a month ago and was caused by a screwdriver that fell down a

hole in the floor and lodged in the fuel selector mechanism. The

selector can't be moved now , but it doesn't matter because it's

jammed on `All tanks', so I suppose that's Okay.



However, as Ron was obviously a nit-picker, I blamed the noise on

vibration from a stainless steel thermos flask which I keep in a

beaut little possie between the windshield and the magnetic compass.

My explanation seemed to relax Ron, because he slumped back in the

seat and kept looking up at the cockpit roof. I released the brakes

to taxi out, but unfortunately the plane gave a leap and spun to the

right. "Hell" I thought, "not the starboard wheel chock again".



The bump jolted Ron back to full alertness. He looked around just in

time to see a rock thown by the prop-wash disappear completely

through the windscreen of his brand new Commodore. "Now I'm really

in

trouble", I thought.



While Ron was busy ranting about his car, I ignored his requirement

that we taxi to the ALA, and instead took off under the power lines.

Ron didn't sa y a word, at least not until the engine started

coughing

right at the lift off point, and then he bloody screamed his head

off. "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!"



"Now take it easy, Ron" I told him firmly. "That often happens on

take-off and there is a good reason for it". I explained patiently

that I usually run the plane on standard MOGAS, but one day I

accidentally put in a gallon or two of kerosene. To compensate for

the low octane of the kerosene, I siphoned in a few gallons of super

MOGAS and shook the wings up and down a few times to mix it up.

Since

then, the engine has been coughing a bit but in general it works

just

fine, if you know how to coax it properly.



Anyway, at this stage Ron seemed to lose all interest in my test

flight. He pulled out some rosary beads, closed his eyes and became

lost in prayer. (I didn't think anyone was a Catholic these days). I

selected some nice music on the HF radio to help him relax.

BR>Meanwhile, I climbed to my normal cruising altitude of 10,500

feet. I

don't normally put in a flight plan or get the weather because, as

you know getting FAX access out here is a friggin' joke and the

weather is always 8/8 blue anyway. But since I had that near miss

with a Saab 340, I might have to change me thinking on that.



Anyhow, on leveling out, I noticed some wild camels heading into my

improved pasture. I hate bloody camels, and always carry a loaded .

303 clipped inside the door of the Cessna just in case I see any of

the barstards.



We were too high to hit them, but as a matter of principle, I

decided

to have a go through the open window. Mate, when I pulled the bloody

rifle out, the effect on Ron was friggin' electric. As I fired the

first shot his neck lengthened by about six inches and his eyes

bulged like a rabbit with myxo. He really looked as if he had been

jabbed with an electric cattle prod on full pow er. In fact, Ron's

reaction was so distracting that I lost concentration for a second

and the next shot went straight through the port tyre. Ron was a bit

upset about the shooting (probably one of those pinko animal lovers

I

guess) so I decided not to tell him about our little problem with

the

tyre.



Shortly afterwards I located the main herd and decided to do my

fighter pilot trick. Ron had gone back to praying when, in one

smooth

sequence, I pulled on full flaps, cut the power and started a

sideslip from 10,500 feet down to 500 feet at 130 knots indicated

(the last time I looked anyway) and the little needle rushed up to

the red area on me ASI. What a buzz, mate! About half way through

the

descent I looked back in the cabin to see the calves gracefully

suspended in mid air and mooing like crazy. I was going to comment

on

this unusual sight, but Ron looked a bit green and had rolled

himself into the fetal position and w as screamin' his freakin' head

off. Mate, talk about being in a bloody zoo. You should've been

there, it was so bloody funny!



At about 500 feet I leveled out, but for some reason we kept

sinking.

When we reached 50 feet I applied full power but nothin' happened;

no

noise no nothin'. Then, luckily, I heard me instructor's voicein me

head saying "carby heat, carby heat". So I pulled carby heat on and

that helped quite a lot, with the engine finally regaining full

power. Whew, that was really close, let me tell you!



Then mate, you'll never guess what happened next! As luck would have

it, at that height we flew into a massive dust cloud caused by the

cattle and suddenly went I.F. bloody R, mate. BJ, you would have

been

really proud of me as I didn't panic once, not once, but I did make

a

mental note to consider an instrument rating as soon as me gyro is

repaired (something I've been meaning to do for a while now).

Sudden ly Ron's elongated neck and bulging eyes reappeared. His

mouth

opened wide, very wide, but no sound emerged. "Take it easy," I told

him, "we'll be out of this in a minute".

Sure enough, about a minute later we emerged, still straight and

level and still at 50 feet.



Admittedly I was surprised to notice that we were upside down, and I

kept thinking to myself, "I hope Ron didn't notice that I had

forgotten to set the QNH when we were taxiing". This minor

tribulation forced me to fly to a nearby valley in which I had to do

a half roll to get upright again.



By now the main herd had divided into two groups leaving a narrow

strip between them. "Ah!" I thought, "there's an omen. We'll land

right there." Knowing that the tyre problem demanded a slow

approach,

I flew a couple of steep turns with full flap. Soon the stall

warning

horn was blaring so loud in me ear that I cut it's circuit breaker

to

shut it up, but by then I knew we were slow enough anyway. I turned

steeply onto a 75 foot final and put her down with a real thud.

Strangely enough, I had always thought you could only ground loop in

a tail dragger but, as usual, I was proved wrong again!



Halfway through our third loop, Ron at last recovered his sense of

humour.

Talk about laugh. I've never seen the likes of it. He couldn't stop.

We finally rolled to a halt and I released the calves, who bolted

out

of the aircraft like there was no tomorrow.



I then began picking clumps of dry grass. Between gut wrenching fits

of laughter, Ron asked what I was doing. I explained that we had to

stuff the port tyre with grass so we could fly back to the

homestead.

It was then that Ron really lost the plot and started running away

from the aircraft. Can you believe it? The last time I saw him he

was

off into the distance, arms flailing in the air and still shrieking

with laughter. I later heard that he had been confined to a

psychiatric institution - poor bugger!



Anyhow mate, that's enough about Ron. The problem is I got this

letter from CASA withdrawing, as they put it, my privileges to fly;

until I have undergone a complete pilot training course again and

undertaken another flight proficiency test.



Now I admit that I made a mistake in taxiing over the wheel chock

and

not setting the QNH using strip elevation, but I can't see what else

I did that was a so bloody bad that they have to withdraw me flamin'

license. Can you?



Ralph H Bell

Mud Creek Plantation

rickpitcher

Joined: 27 Feb 2007
Posts: 76

Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 8:22 am Post subject: Re: joke for the day

 	  purplemoon99(at)bellsouth wrote: 	
		  Rick, It sounds like I'am as gulity as every one else about over reacting 

about this"hawg" thing,so lets get back to building and helping each other. 

That hawg. that larry built is a 10+ and my Hog-Air now has a 130 Ram eng. 

in it.I will admit that hog's are a hard way to go,that's why we are 

experimental's Have a good night and fly safe.  Joe N101HD 601XL   The H D 

now stands for Hotel Delta

--- 	




'S OK Joe, everyone has an off-day now and then when things just seem to rub them the wrong way. 

You're absolutely right about Larry's 701 Hawg: that's one good looking airplane. Great job Larry 



Rick

rstone4(at)hot.rr.com
Guest

Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 9:00 am Post subject: joke for the day

Your story sounds too fantastic to be true.  And I thought us "Yanks" 

were the biggest bull shiters in the world



Tracy Stone



---

rstone4(at)hot.rr.com
Guest

Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 9:01 am Post subject: joke for the day

Will someone please explain to me what a "Howg engine is.  If it's a 

motorcycle engine, which one is it?



Tracy Stone



---

bryanmmartin

Joined: 10 Jan 2006
Posts: 1018

Posted: Fri Jun 08, 2007 9:27 am Post subject: joke for the day

It refers to a Harley-Davidson motorcycle.



On Jun 8, 2007, at 12:59 PM, robert stone wrote:

 	  Quote: 	
		  --> Zenith-List message posted by: "robert stone" <rstone4(at)hot.rr.com (rstone4(at)hot.rr.com)>

    Will someone please explain to me what a "Howg engine is.  If it's a motorcycle engine, which one is it?

Tracy Stone

	






 -- 

Bryan Martin

N61BM, CH 601 XL,

RAM Subaru, Stratus redrive.

do not archive.

 



 [quote][b]

_________________
--
Bryan Martin
N61BM, CH 601 XL, Stratus Subaru.
do not archive.

amyvega2005(at)earthlink.
Guest

Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 9:36 am Post subject: joke for the day

to all who found the jokes and lite heartenness not good,  I think you all need to get your selves a handfull of stool softener and ingest it ASAP.  You need to loosen up!



The Tarpon fishing and shark fishing was great by the way.  Hooked up 6 trpons over 100 Lbs, and landed 3.  



PLane is in the paint shop, should be done in two weeks.



Juan



--

japhillipsga(at)aol.com
Guest

Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 11:56 am Post subject: joke for the day

Juan, I agree with you. We are pilots and builders and mostly happy. If your butt is so tight you can't enjoy the moment just pass on. Now to something really important. Juan, where did you catch fish such as you described ? Is it near enough to fly to in with my 24 gallon Super XL ?Â Did you charter a boat to get to them ? Best regards and I wish I was helping you eat those fish, Bill of Georgia 

 

 --

d.goddard(at)ns.sympatico
Guest

Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 12:29 pm Post subject: joke for the day

I don't know about these discussions, they seem  divisive. Otoh, they may be nescessary. I once belonged to a club, we were all a  friendly lot and got along relatively well. One day a new member showed up and  was welcomed. He was an enthusiastic chap and set about getting deeply involved.  Before long he started putting forth his ideas, shortly thereafter he started  insisting on them, and eventually demanding they be adopted. Dealing with  him was a tiring task involving a withering assault which resulted in him  getting his way. Long story short, the club is no more. 

  

 Something to think about when a person demands that  no humor, no asides, belong in HIS newsgroup. 

  

 do not archive. 

 [quote]   ---

amyvega2005(at)earthlink.
Guest

Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 12:38 pm Post subject: joke for the day

Bill,

to answer your question, went with a guide on two separate ocassions while there.  great fun!

Boca Grand in FLorida is 70 miles south of St, Petersburg/Tampa FLA.  A great trip in the 601xl!

The fish were Tarpon, and they average 80 to 200 lbs. they call it the King of fighting fish.  Think of pulling a car from 90 feet deep and then it running away from you at 30 mph!.  A Marlin on Steroids!  Boca Grand is the salt water fishing capital of the South East.  You can fly into Ft. Myers airport, rent a car and you are in Boca Grand within 30 minutes.  When you get on the island , you can rent an appratment for $200.00/night.  Eat dinner at the Pink elephant which has been araound for 90 years.  This place is like being in the Bahamas. Great fishing all around you for all sorts of game fish-  Shark, tarpon, snook, pompano GINORMOUS Red fish,  Call ahead to the chamber of commerce and they will give you a list of FIshing Guides.  It is a great weekend for Hubby and wife.The beaches are second to none.



BRING GOOD SUN BLOCK

Juan

--

n4546v(at)mindspring.com
Guest

Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 12:58 pm Post subject: joke for the day

Well, if we ever do have a member who  needs delt with, I want Bill of Georgia to handle it.  If he wants to help  Juan eat Tarpon & Shark, he's one tough Son of a Gun!  What does he  pick his teeth with?  A pike pole? 

  

 Yuks & Regards & do not  archive,

  

 Randy, Las Vegas

  

 [quote]   Something to think about when a person demands    that no humor, no asides, belong in HIS newsgroup. 

    

    

   I wish I was helping you eat those fish, Bill of Georgia 



    	  Quote: 	
		        	  Quote: 	
		  

The Tarpon fishing and shark fishing was great by the way.  Hooked up 6 trpons 

over 100 Lbs, and landed 3.  	


	
[b]

Kevin Bonds

Joined: 09 Jan 2006
Posts: 171
Location: Nashville, Tn

Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 9:14 pm Post subject: joke for the day

I don't think this is appropriate conversation for . . . Ha Ha just kidding.

I'm waiting on that serious one though. Anyone what to make a wager on when

it will come through. 



Anyway, I'm a fly-fisherman. I have always wanted to do some saltwater

fly-fishing. Anywhere around there to do that? Sounds like a fun trip once

my plane is done. Daydreaming, about these sorts of things, keeps me going

during those long building sessions. And that is VERY relevant in my

opinion. Thanks for that.



Also I agree with Tracy Stone; ignore people who are just trying to be

disagreeable. I was addressed last week for making a dry joke. You'll notice

I pretty much ignored it, and resisted the urge to answer back. Thought it

would be a worse crime to add emails to the situation. Just found the whole

situation ironic anyway. 



Kevin Bonds



Nashville TN

601XL Plans building.

http://home.comcast.net/~kevinbonds

do not archive DO NOT ARCHIVE 



 

--

_________________
KevinBonds
Nashville, TN
Plans-building Zenith CH601XL w/Corvair Power
http://home.comcast.net/~kevinbonds

amyvega2005(at)earthlink.
Guest

Posted: Tue Jun 12, 2007 4:43 am Post subject: joke for the day

on the fly fishing in boca grand, just pick a spot.  it is a fly fisherman's paradise.  some guides just do fly.

checked on the paint job, looks good. it will be Base WHite with a navy metalic blue bottom, and of course a red pin stripe.



JUan



--

fderfler(at)gmail.com
Guest

Posted: Tue Jun 12, 2007 3:25 pm Post subject: joke for the day

Regarding fishing at Boca Grande... (the locals add the "e")    I would suggest  Charlotte County airport as being very friendly to GA pilots.  See (full disclosure: my website)   http://www.flyinflorida.com/images/Charlotte_County_Airport.pdf

-- 

Frank Derfler  AMD-made 601XL 183AM 

See my information for pilots at www.flyinflorida.com 

 See my book reviews at www.greatguybooks.com  

  

  

  [quote][b]

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